Making Flippy Floppy

Lass Had 65 Fads I am currently suffering throught the experience of using the ancient, rarely used Compaq computer tucked away in the back office at work. Why, you may ask, are you not using your shiny silver $1700 Dell laptop as usual? Well, I'd answer, because the friggin' keyboard suddenly went tits-up on me last night and will only type the letters a,s,d,f,g,h,j,k,l, plus 5 and 6!! That's it. This happened in the middle of writing an essay for my Computer Forensics class that is already late, and unless I wanted to write a lot about "sad gas" I was outta luck. So, at nearly 2AM I decide to call Dell Tech support and actually, the guy was very very nice and knowledgable and didn't sound like he was being beamed in from Sri Lanka. I was bitchy at first, telling him that I was rather unhappy with the state of this machine I was still paying for and that was less than a year old (the casing is also falling apart on me), and where the hell where we going to start fixing this shit? He was calm and very smooth, apologetic, with a wonderfully hypnotic, sorta smoky deep voice. He said they would send a replacement keyboard out ASAP but it could take a week or so. He walked me though the steps of installing the thing (easier than I thought) so I'm not lost when I get it. He even gave me his own personal extension for if I have any more problems or "just wanna chat." It might be love. Anyway, if my posts here drop off a bit this week it's because I am basically computerless - I will check in on this beasty Compaq when I'm at work, and will be using the ones on Campus as well, so I won't be too far gone at least... Fame Makes A Man Take Things Over When I got to work today, Bea - one of our volunteers - said to me with amazement in her voice: "Wow...you're famous!" and I said "Uh, OK. Whaddya mean?" and she told me she had been reading my articles in the Handle Extra and that my name and some quotes were printed in Dave Oliveria's Huckleberries column in the Spokesman-Review again and that everyone was just all abuzz about it. They printed my real full name and everything. Not that I was actually striving for anonymity I guess, I mean my own SR column has my big face next to my name, but it's still a touch surreal to imagine who is out there reading my random thoughts. So, "famous"? I don't really think so, but it is always nice to be featured in Huckleberries, especially with something I'd never really expect to see printed in there. I had 15 minutes to kill the other aftermoon so I wrote some stuff off the top of my head and posted it on Huckleberries Online, had a quite busy weekend and basically forgot about the post until there it is, paraphrased in the newspaper for the world to see. All I know is that if the CDA Resort and the rest of Hagadonia doesn't already have my face on a "wanted" poster, they do now. Plus: "Naked Bear Riding?" Lou is gonna love that one. DFO didn't print the whole list, and left out some of my favorites, so I think I might expand on the concept a bit and perhaps turn it into an actual column, or at least post it here. Meanwhile, this morning's Huckleberries column in full:

AM Hucks: Saddle Up for Some Naked Bear Riding At Huckleberries Online, the writer of the Making Flippy Floppy blog is known as "OrangeTV." You know him as Patrick Jacobs, the new local restaurant/nightlife reviewer for our Handle Extra. Over the weekend, OTV accepted a challenge to list reasons to visit downtown Coeur d'Alene, beginning with a disclaimer: "Granted, it's pretty much been overrun by chi-chi little touristy galleries and 'boutiques' but I wanted to challenge myself to come up with some good reasons to make the trip downtown now and then." Here's an abridged version of OTV's list: George Nolan's Books; ghost hunting at Señor Froggy's; a dozen folk-guitarists in a dozen wine bars and cafes, all playing Dave Matthews covers; the spectacularly fabulous Candy O'Brien in her salacious fashion boutique for rich drag queens and lady mayors; a cruise through the resort driveway to watch a valet run out before you speed off, cackling; hot baristas and Wi-Fi at Cafe Doma; a ride on the metal bear statue at Art Spirit naked at 3 a.m. (which includes pictures); Pita Pit; $5 student haircuts at Headmasters; 2-for-1's at Iron Horse with free mega-appetizers; a Bowl of Soul at Java; a trip to Beverly's dressed in full evening wear just to order coffee; Camera Corral; the Eagles Lodge, where you can get bombed with the old folks; sweaty basketball on the city park slab in the summer when it's hot; permanent eye makeup at Crown Design; and a visit to Thomas Kinkade Gallery to rant loudly about right-wing conspiracy and UFO cults. Can you add to OTV's list?

Labels: Computer Blues, Downtown CDA, Spokesman-Review